Beyond the Wide Wall: Humorous Fantasy (Epic Fallacy Book 2) by Ploof Michael James

Author:Ploof, Michael James [Ploof, Michael James]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
Publisher: Traveling Bard Publishing
Published: 2017-04-30T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter 21

High Times on the High Seas

Another four days of sailing brought the Iron Fist around the horn of the Northern Barrens, and just as McArgh had said, the coast was rocky and unapproachable.

Hagus stood in the crow’s nest, watching out for enemy ships or sea monsters, anything to keep his mind busy. He worried for Gibrig out there in the big world beyond the Wide Wall. Hagus had been less afraid when he had been under the illusion that his son was somehow a champion, but now that the truth had come to light, he found himself fretting so much for his last surviving son that he got hardly any sleep.

He thought of Gillrog then, and how he might have done something to save his timid son. During the war, Hagus had seen too many dwarves’ spirits destroyed. He had tried to raise the lads more gently than was usual for dwarves, tried to teach them compassion and kindness like their mother would have. Now, he cursed himself for making his sons so soft in such a hard, cruel world. In the end, he realized, he had done them no favors.

“What you doing up so high-high, eh?” said Dingleberry, who was suddenly hovering in front of Hagus’s nose.

He turned abruptly and wiped his wet cheeks. “What ye be thinkin’ I be doin’ up a crow’s nest, eh?”

“You up here being a caw-caw crow-crow?” she guessed, scratching her head with uncertainty.

“Bein’ a…now that just don’t make no sense.”

“Yup-yup, sure it do-do. The dark witch changed into a raven bird-bird. Why not you too?”

“Well, dwarves ain’t got the power to change into a crow, or any other bird for that matter.”

“Not even dwarf wiz-wiz?”

“Wiz-wiz? You mean pee-pee? Now ye just talkin’ nonsense,” said Hagus in a huff.

“No, weirdo, wiz-wiz, like wizard.”

“Dwarves ain’t got no wizards. We got magi.”

“Magi, wiz-wiz, what’s the difference?”

“Magi be dwarves, that be what the difference be, ye silly sprite. Now go on, pester someone else.”

Dingleberry stuck out her tongue and, turning, shot her butt up in the air in front of Hagus’s face. He swatted at her half-heartedly as she flew away.

“Silly sprite,” he said, though she had helped to take his mind off his ponderings.

With a sigh and a last look at the endless ocean, he climbed down and went searching the mess hall for something to eat. The sun was beginning to set anyway, and he hadn’t eaten since the early morning.

To his delight, he found the others sitting around one of the long wooden tables playing a game of 240 with a set of twelve-sided dice. It seemed that Wendel was on a winning streak, for he had a pile of copper in front of him and was cackling like the skeleton he was.

“I want in next game,” said Hagus, trying to see over the heads of the pirate women.

“Shall I get you a stool, or perhaps a chair?” said Valkimir, handing Hagus a pint of frothing ale and smirking.

“Ah,” said Hagus, realizing how very thirsty he was and accepting the drink eagerly.

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